For the longest time – actually most of my life, I’ve felt lost, living in someone else’s skin. It’s about time I’ve shed the stuff other people have tried to envelop me with:
“The greatest hazard of all – losing one’s self – can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all. No other loss can occur so quietly; any other loss – an arm, a leg, five dollars, a wife, etc. – is sure to be noticed.”
– Søren Kierkegaard
I was never as scared as when I needed to block a family member from my life. But I needed to do it to be able to finally respect myself and take care of my emotional self:
“You gain strength, courage, and confidence
by every experience in which
you really stop to look fear in the face.
You must do the thing
which you think you cannot do.”
– Eleanor Roosevelt
Learning to just be me, moment by moment – a fluid and ever-changing person, acceptable in all my inconsistencies – to work hard and then let go of any results – to release the Me inside. Gosh, it’s hard.
“We insist on being Someone, with a capital S. We get security from defining ourselves as worthless or worthy, superior or inferior. We waste precious time exaggerating or romanticizing or belittling ourselves with a complacent surety that yes, that’s who we are. We mistake the openness of our being—the inherent wonder and surprise of each moment—for a solid, irrefutable self. Because of this misunderstanding, we suffer.”
– Pema Chödrön, The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times